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恻隐之心疲乏的关怀

October 14, 2013 cm-admin 中文 0

14 Oct 2013 by Lim Poh Ann-

如何成为一位不将自己推到死角又满有爱心的关怀者？

虽然上帝并没有呼召我们成为对别人的需要不敏感或是漠不关心的人，但是当我们尝试用尽办法去满足那些‘有需要’的人时，特别是那些永远都无法满足的人，自己必须要谨慎。否则，我们就会很容易地被推倒一个死角里，成了缺乏同情心的受害者。

正因为许多关怀者无法认清并满足自己的需要，而导致他们出现了倦怠的情况。如果关怀者无法爱自己，那么，他们应该如何去爱别人呢？他们必须认识自己情感压力的承受能力，否则他们将无法以爱心去服侍他人。

其实，没有任何人能够一直持续地成为情感和属灵上的供应者。提供安慰和救济也会有枯竭时候的。倘若关怀者允许别人来分担自己的职责，好让自己可以有喘气的空间时，其实关怀者并不需要为此感到内疚。

每个人，包括关怀者，需要定期让自己情感和属灵有充电的时间。当中可以包括肉体的休息、娱乐、旅游、花时间与好朋友相聚、陶醉于美味佳肴或是喜好，如音乐、电影等。

更重要的是，关怀者千万不要忽略花时间亲近神、祷告、敬拜神并默想上帝的话语。

次日凌晨，天还没有亮，耶稣起身出去，来到荒野的地方，在那里祷告。（马可福音 1：35）

但那些仰望耶和华的人，必重新得力；他们必像鹰一样展翅上腾；他们奔跑，也不困倦，他们行走，也不疲乏。（以赛亚书 40:31）

靠你有力量，

心中向往通到圣殿大道的，

这人是有福的。

他们经过干旱的山谷，

使这谷变为泉源之地，

更有秋雨使这谷到处都是水池。

（诗篇 84:5）

若是可以，关怀者应该更多地鼓励‘有需要的人’成为能够自力更生的人。那些有需要的人必须要自己学会独立，而非长时间依赖别人；若不然，就会形成“依赖症”。

相关文章：

WHO CARES?

A honest look at the realities of caring for the aged—without forgetting the caregivers. The Chinese have a saying, “Long illness breeds unfilial children.” How true! Children these days are finding their filial piety stretched to the limits with all kinds of complex situations arising from caring for their aged parents.

http://www.asianbeacon.org/who-cares/

COMPASSION FATIGUE

Loving requires energy as it involves giving of ourselves. As such, it’s people with big hearts who suffer. Many caregivers and counsellors get burnt out giving love and care without realising it.

“We do not want people to perish before their time. We want caregivers to conserve their energy so that they can serve for many more years.”

http://www.asianbeacon.org/compassion-fatigue/

DRAINING YOUR TANK BY HELPING PEOPLE

Are you getting worn out by people who won’t be satisfied no matter what you do for them? Have you established boundaries beyond which you know God doesn’t want you to continue helping people who won’t be helped?

http://georgeowood.com/draining-your-tank-by-pleasing-people/

Source :

Porridge For The Soul By Dr Lim Poh Ann

http://limpohann.blogspot.com/

http://limpohann.blogspot.com/2013/04/compassion-fatigue.html

Disclaimer: The views or opinions expressed by the columnists are solely their own and do not necessarily represent the views or opinions of Christianity Malaysia.com

Note: This article was translated by Joycelyn Loh in Christianity Malaysia (CM).Amen.