Knowing Him- Jasmin Hoy

29 April 2013 by Jasmin Hoy-

 

As I ponder upon the things that God had done in my life, it had inspired me to share with you this testimony on how I came to know Him better or rather, how He had brought me into His divine kingdom.

My search for Him started when my mother passed away while I was in Lower Six back in 1990. Little did I know that God had great and mighty plans in store for me, just as in Jer. 1:5, ‘Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart…’

 

 

My mother’s funeral (of a Chinese ceremony) was the first funeral that I ever attended and I was curious with many things that took place so much so that, I started to ask many questions. I remembered vividly one day in class, where I asked a friend this, “When you die, would you like to be buried or cremated?” I was surprised when she answered that it doesn’t matter whether she will be buried or cremated because she would be going to heaven either way. She started to tell me about Jesus and I was quite angry with her answers as I had the ‘seeing is believing’ attitude. Feeling dissatisfied, I went on to ask the same question to the person next to me, not knowing that she was also a Christian. Much to my frustration, I received the same answer. Since then, I had always been curious about life after death.

One day in January 1991, a group of us were discussing on the invasion of Kuwait and the speculation of the Gulf War. And just as God had planned, the conversation ended up with ‘end times’ and ‘Revelation’ in the Bible. Subsequently, I regarded the book on Revelation as the ‘Christian Almanac.’ Much to my surprise, I was given a Bible and a glossy booklet entitled ‘Ultimate Questions’ by John Blanchard the following morning. I must admit that, I had ignored the Bible and kept it under my bed for three years before utilizing it.

I went on to work with a bank after my form six for fifteen months before coming to HELP. I felt I needed the extra qualifications to survive in this realistic world. As I looked back, I believe that right from the start, God had laid out the plan He had for me and I’m certain that it is by no coincidence that He placed me in this college.

It was at the Christian Fellowship (CF) that I surrendered my life to Him through one of the evangelistic meetings. I did not know what I was doing then. When I was led in the sinner’s prayer, I did it merely to please the person in front of me so that I can be free to leave after that and I am also free from offending her. After all, she promised that it would only take five minutes. Little did I know of the power of that simple prayer. Even though I was not faithful to the prayer, God was, for 2 Tim 2:13 says, ‘if we are faithless, he will remain faithful, for He cannot disown Himself.’

 

 

My ultimate goal at HELP was to get a degree and to finish it at the shortest time possible. Thus, I was very ambitious. I finished my first year in a breeze as I was taking four units each semester where as the norm was three. I was too proud of my own achievements and believed that I did it with my own strength. I became arrogant and pride got over me.

I repeated the same stint of four units for my second year and it was then, God began to work in me without my knowledge. But our God is a gentle God. He started to reveal to me gradually but I was insensitive to Him, not until He took away what I had treasured most i.e. my degree. And soon, I started to fail… Three units in a row! It was too much to bear. I was totally dumbfounded! My plans were interrupted and things just did not go right. Why me? I started to doubt my ability. That’s when I remembered Him and that prayer. God was good. Like what 1 Cor. 10:13 says, ‘He is faithful and will not let me be tempted beyond what I could bear and will also provide a way out so that I can stand up under it.’ He sent the right people to guide me and at the most appropriate time.

Gradually, I learned of His grace and began to humble myself; I realized what a sinner I was! Slowly, I learned to trust in Him and to put my faith in Him and things began to go accordingly. I began to see with my spiritual eyes and to live by faith and not by sight as in 2 Cor. 5:7. I started to attend CF and church more regularly. And later I even joined one of their cell groups (CG).

 

 

I repeated the prayer again then. This time, I said it with faith, hope and trust. The scripture in Romans 5:1-5 spoke to me, “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our suffering because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us.’

From then onwards, I put my hope in Him in all that I do and had since passed all the exams that I had set. My results were indeed better when I had depended on Him as compared to when I did it with my own strength. Praise the Lord! By His grace and mercy, I have finally finished my course within three years. Not a semester more, not a semester less (in God’s perfect timing). Not only that I received the degree but also His divine wisdom and the knowing His love which cannot be bought.

Throughout the years, He has taught me faith, then hope and followed by love. All of which I’m still learning. Although I did not understand any of His thoughts and His ways in the beginning as in Isa. 55:8-9, I thank God for His mercy that I did not go through any physical disaster to know Him  but it only took three units. Now that I had left college, I know that I have been placed there with a purpose. What about you?

‘I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes…’ –Romans 1:16

 

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