{"id":39368,"date":"2014-11-02T22:43:11","date_gmt":"2014-11-02T14:43:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/christianitymalaysia.com\/wp\/?p=39368"},"modified":"2022-02-11T15:53:14","modified_gmt":"2022-02-11T07:53:14","slug":"value-your-best-friends","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/christianitymalaysia.com\/wp\/value-your-best-friends\/","title":{"rendered":"Value Your Best Friends"},"content":{"rendered":"

2 Nov 2014 by Reverend Dr Steven Kau –<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I remember years ago being invited to share a message at one of my best friend\u2019s marriage. <\/span>When it came time to share a short message before the dinner began, I ended my message <\/span>by saying, \u201cI thought that when one grew up, a best friend was often no longer part of our <\/span>life. However, you have taught me that a best friend continues to be one of the most <\/span>important elements of your life by being mine.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

After the dinner, as I was exiting the hall where the dinner was held, a man walked over to\u00a0<\/span>me and asked if I was a preacher. When I said, \u201cYes,\u201d he took my arm and said, \u201cI hope you <\/span>preach the message you made tonight. People need to know about friendship today; people <\/span>don\u2019t have best friends and that is a real problem in our world.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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\"sxc-silhouette-father-walking-daughter-down-the-aisle\"<\/a>
Ref : mensteppingupblog<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

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In the last few days, I looked back at that episode in my life and began to reflect again on <\/span>the comment that man made and to see how true his words were, especially today. Indeed, <\/span>some of us today have lots of friends but very few that we can class as best friends. <\/span>Although we have more ways to connect than ever before, we have built islands of isolation <\/span>and many people even though surrounded by \u201cfriends\u201d are very lonely people.<\/span><\/p>\n

I have found over the years as I interact with people and had opportunity to provide some <\/span>counseling and identify and relate with issues and concerns in their lives, I discovered that <\/span>many adults walking around our world don\u2019t really have a single person who they can call a <\/span>best friend. When they left school, college or university and their place of employment, they <\/span>had completely lost touch with their best friends.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"aa-friends\"<\/a>
Ref : saveamericascinemas<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

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I remember eventually preaching a sermon on friendship at a church where I was the guest <\/span>speaker and focused how my best friend offered me continual salvation and checked on me <\/span>every once in a while. Leaving that church that morning, one of the oldest member\u2019s <\/span>stopped me with tears rolling down his cheeks and said, \u201cI buried my best friend a few days <\/span>ago and it\u2019s been really hard to grieve losing a best friend in a world that does not <\/span>understand that. Thanks for creating that space and giving those words to me.\u201d A young <\/span>mother walked by with tears in her eyes and said, \u201cPastor that is what is missing in my life. <\/span>I need a best friend like that.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

How can one journey through life without a best friend? How can ministers preach <\/span>sermons trying to get to communities of faith to follow Jesus if they are on a solo journey <\/span>themselves? How is life ever possible without the community of close and intimate <\/span>friendship? Close friends provide us a place to be authentically ourselves as well as space to <\/span>practice hospitality and inclusion. Best friends allows us to be honest about our doubts, <\/span>gives light in our darkest hours, provide foundations for ministry and models what true, <\/span>authentic and good lives look like. What makes a friend worthy of the name \u2013 Best Friend? An article from Psychology Today<\/a> gives a few pointers:\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"youth-Copy\"<\/a>
Ref : aboutbfbc<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

 <\/p>\n

a. Your best friend is committed to your happiness \u2013 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

A true friend is consistently willing to <\/span>put your happiness before your friendship. It is said, \u201cgood advice grates on the ears\u201d <\/span>but a true friend won\u2019t refrain from telling you something you don\u2019t want to hear; <\/span>something that may even risk fracturing the friendship, if hearing it lies in your best <\/span>interest. A true friend will not lack the mercy to correct you when you are wrong. <\/span><\/p>\n

Your best friend is not just sympathetic, they are emphatic. They share your feelings, <\/span>weep with you when you weep and rejoice with you when you rejoice. Your best friend <\/span>stands with and stands up for who you are! He or she is someone who sees the pain in <\/span>your eyes while everyone else believes the smile on your face.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

b. Your best friend will not ask you to place the friendship before your principles<\/strong> \u2013<\/span><\/p>\n

A <\/span>true friend won\u2019t ask you to compromise your principles in the name of your friendship <\/span>or anything else. Ever! Best friends multiples the good in life and is a constant\u00a0<\/span>companion against evil.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

c. Your best friend will be a good influence<\/strong> \u2013 <\/span><\/p>\n

A true friend inspires you to live up to <\/span>your best potential, not to indulge your basest drives. Good friends allows you to make <\/span>mistakes and love you anyway. They aren\u2019t afraid to say you are being an idiot. Best <\/span>friends are out biggest encouragers. They are dependable, trustworthy and unselfish.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Sunset-with-Friends\"<\/a>
Ref : findingthegracewithin<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

 <\/p>\n

On my ministry journey, I am very grateful to my best friends from yesteryears and church <\/span>members who had taken the role of my best friends, whose love and encouragement kept <\/span>me going when the going was hard. I have no illusion I could have gotten this far without <\/span>their support. I am blessed by this friendship as any other sacrament in my life. And that <\/span>should not be surprising. History and theology prove how important friendship is.<\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s time for Christians to reclaim the importance of friendship and not the kind we form <\/span>through Facebook or other social media platforms. To see the importance of friendships is <\/span>to find expressions of salvation and grace. We often get so caught up in the trials and <\/span>tribulations of life that we forget how short it really is. Fill your life with people who add <\/span>value to it and let go of the ones who do not. In the end, a true friend can see the words in <\/span>your heart and tell the story of your life when your memory is gone.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

|Share The Good News|<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

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