21 April 2013 by Adeline Lum CM-
This is the third part of a 3 SERIES talk by Pastor Edmund Smith on the 'freedom of Christ' among sexually broken people (SBP) in FGA Kota Damansara on April 6 at 5 P.M. Please click HERE for the first part of the article and click HERE for the second part:
“Many people look normal but there’s really hope for the sexually different people,” said Edmund.
“There are many pro LGBT around, meaning people who support LGBT and most of these supporters are heterosexuals. But you don’t know how it feels like to be gay. Do you know how much tears I shed? Have you have a sex change before? Did you know the pain of being a gay? Think twice before you become a pro LGBT. Churches are becoming pro LGBT. Celebrities, TV programs and the world are becoming pro LGBT. Do you know what is becoming of our children?” said Pastor Edmund.
“Instead of becoming pro-LGBT, be LGBT friendly. Show love and pray for your brothers and sister-in-Christ who are struggling with homosexuality. Help them to become an Ex-LGBT. Do not run away from them. Don’t have a holier-than-thou spirit. Where is your confidence? Where is your security? Why are you afraid of walking with a brother and sister who’re struggling sexually? Don’t make gay or lesbian jokes because it hurts,” he added.
Next, he shared about the definition of hermaphrodite, gender-blind, transgender, transsexual, transvestite, androgynous, pedophile, metrosexual, fetrosexual, and homophyllic.
How did Real Love Ministries started?
In 1999, Pastor Edmund prayed to God to start serving Him aggressively. He had been a community worker since 13 years old and taught in the handicapped and deaf schools. One of his biggest passions is reaching out to the deaf and mute with sign languages. But God said to him, “Why don’t you reach out to your own people?”
Although he was an ex-gay at that time, nobody knew about his past because he acted like a man. It was embarrassing! But God woke him up at 3 A.M. and brought him into prayer in spirits. He was told to share his past with 20 people. So, he obeyed God, typed his story and send out his confession in email to the 20 best people he thought would understand him. After he sent, he could feel the Spirit of God gushing over him, with a deep peace.
“After that, strangers who are sexually broken would approach me. The first one was this petite lady in a floral dress. While I accompanied a friend struggling with homosexuality to church, a stranger came up to me after service and said, “I don’t know how to share this with you… but I am a lesbian.” I told her that I was an “ex gay” as well. And in my heart, God convicted in me that He would bring more people like that into my life. So, the moral of the lesson is to be obedient to God,” said Edmund.
Hence, Real Love Ministry (RLM) started in 1999 in Singapore. In 2002, he moved back to Melaka, Malaysia when Amanda was pregnant. Nevertheless, his approach to churches was turned down one after one.
Seeds to Sexual Brokenness
What are the seeds to sexual brokenness? They include:
1. The Self-Issue
2. The Vacuum Issue
3. The Barrier Issue
“These issues are all resolvable. People do not become LGBT suddenly but they have one issue in life because the seed was there,” said Edmund.
The self-issue is a rejection of one’s gender, which causes a gender-identity disorder (GID) and could manifest into being a transgender or transsexual. The appearance issue is a rejection of one’s appearance, which could manifest into admiring and being attracted to people of the same gender, resulting in sexual attraction.
2. Vacuum Issue
The vacuum issue due to lack of one or two parental loves, can manifest itself during puberty into a certain sexual orientation.
“When you have a vacuum, you have an intensified need to be loved and to love other’s of the same gender. Every child needs the love from a mother and a father, making the two wings of a ‘V’. But if a child grew up with no mummy love, then he loses one wing from the ‘V’. Hence, how can he fly when he grow up?” illustrated Edmund.
“Mummy’s love is feminine. Daddy’s love is masculine. Mummy cannot give masculine love and Daddy cannot give feminine love. When you have a vacuum, it feels like you’re a vacuum machine and you would suck in all the dirt. They would suck in all the hurtful people into their lives,” he added.
3. Barrier Issue
The barrier issue is the inability to naturally or romantically or sexually involve with others of the opposite gender. Barrier issue occurs during puberty, when there’s a fear or hate towards the opposite sex, which lead to a homosexual orientation. Barrier could also come from negative experiences of the opposite gender i.e. nagging.
“All these three issues need counseling. The person has to ask for help. Some are milder and some are more severe. The person needs to come to a place of loving themselves. A lot of people don't take care of themselves and they reject themselves. We are all beautiful in our own way. Some can’t even look at themselves in the mirror but I took them to the mirror and said: look how beautiful you are!” said Edmund.
The practical way to resolve the vacuum is to have a deep platonic relationship with a woman or man, and seek the Lord.
There’re three seasons in the Journey of Recovery (JOR). Resolve the self-issue first followed by the vacuum issue by being open to a deep platonic relationship, and lastly be open to date the opposite gender. Each season is built progressively on one another, where one needs to graduate in self-issue first before going to the next stage.
Young people might be confused with their stand on whether to support LGBT or not because it is a topic not addressed in church. In a nutshell, homosexual behavior is clearly wrong in the Bible. However, it is our job to love and pray for the sinner (cliché as it sounds) and to help them into a journey of recovery towards becoming who God meant them to be. Let us not stay complacent or indifferent towards this subject. It is real and happening in our church. Let us fight this together.
For more information on Real Love Ministries, please visit http://www.r-l-m.com/index.php. The remaining third part will be uploaded on another day.
Are you interested to have the 'Journey to Recovery Program' in your church, which takes a commitment of once-a-month visit by Pastor Edmund for three years? Please email Pastor Edmund Smith at email@example.com
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